Today is the day I was waiting for, eagerly anticipating the birth of my fifth baby, my third little boy. I was worried about him being breech, too big, maybe ending with a c-section. Even as the doubts and the fear tickled my brain, knowing something was wrong, knowing this pregnancy would not have a happy ending. I thought it would be a c-section, that I wouldn't get the birth I was longing for, unfortunately I was right. Yet, I was wrong in so many ways.
Today I would give anything to be laying on the OR table, epidural in my back, IV in my hand and a bay to hold in my arms.
Precious little boy. My tiny saint Colm. I love you and miss you. I am thinking of you today on the day you were supposed to be born.